Monday, February 9, 2009

Dysfunctional Relationship

When it rains it pours right?

My IT Band is shot.
My doctor's an idiot.
I hate Valentines day.
My only true love has left me crippled.
I'm PMSing and want to eat a whole gallon of ice cream.
The physical and emotional pain will not go way...I have asked nicely and even offered sugar on top.

Now I'm go into each one of the "bitches" from above

Dysfunctional Relationships - I have come to realize that I view training as a form of relationship or boy/girlfriend. Day in and day out I eat (fuel) to train, I sleep to train, I work to train, I wrap my body in training gear....everything for the love of the swim, bike and run. For the most part I think I treat this relationship pretty well. I plan my life schedule around setting enough time to sleep, setting time for injury prevention (pilates, stretching and rolling), eating 6-10 times a day - clean for the most part. I opt to spend my extra fun $$$ on training gear that will help make our relationship stronger. Instead of buying the pretty sparkly bike shorts I opt for the plain black compression. Function over fashion. I give training my love, hard work and dedication. BUT I also abuse my training which could view as domestic violence. I hurt my leg last week. I should have given it the time it needed to get healthy again...but no, I was selfish. Selfish, stubborn Kat thought my leg should "Toughen The Fuck Up". I mean, that's what I do, shouldn't I expect that from what I love. (Yes I know this is getting weird, but do remember who is writing here and well you're still reading so what's that say about you? :)) So I continued the abuse. I'd play Dr. Jekyel and Mr. Hyde. I'd run and abuse it, then try to sugar coat the mess with ice and massage. I should have stopped the abuse before it went overboard. Finally my leg decided not to take it anymore and just gave up and left me. So here I sit, literally sit because if I try to stand up I'll probably fall over again, alone and broken hearted. I'm miserable. My leg will not listen to me. I've tried to drugs, ice and's not responding. I'm only praying it will grow soft for me again and the love will return, as mine will never die.

My doctor is a tool. Why is it that "we" as in athletes have to go to doctor that doesn't specialize in athletics before we get to see a sports doc? I tried to explain the whole injury to my doc, which by the way I'm very good at because this whole little incident happened 3 1/2 years ago....and I felt as if I was talking to a glass wall. Her facial expressions never changed. She thinks the problem is in my calf when it is CLEARLY my IT Band. Sure my calf hurts, as does my knee and my hamstring, all on the outside of the leg. Her advice, take 800mg IB Ibuprofen 4 x times a day, ice and don't run for 3-4 weeks. WTF?! Are you kidding me? I don't like taking pills so I asked for a topical anti-inflammatory, she said they don't make them. BS. She referred me to a sports doc who will call me for an appointment within a week. Really? You're going to make me wait a week to even schedule an appointment? This is such BS. A shot of cortisone will help my inflammation, GIVE ME MY SHOT! She prescribed a high dose of anti-inflammatory which thus far hasn't done %^$, vicodin to alleviate some pain so that I can sleep (did I mention I didn't sleep last night?)....and leave me zombie like for the following 8-12 hours. When I went to get my prescription filled I spoke with the pharmacists who gave me a topical anti-inflammatory. Proof my doctor is an idiot. I will not be going back to her. $%%^$#$%#@#$%^%^*&!!!!

I F$#@#$@$# hate Valentines Day. Everywhere I go I see these stupid hearts, flower and candy. And what do I have? Massive PMS and my true love (training yet again) has dumped me before the big day. What a b$%#%$. I think I'm going to sit home alone with a tub of Butterfinger Ice Cream and watch a series of Ugly Betty. Maybe I'll treat myself with some torture from the foam roller.

Wow, I am really positive aren't I? One thing I can say is that it is nice to go to work and have your boss change your outlook and make you smile, even if it is temporary....
It's times like this I learn who my friends are.
I honestly didn't want to go home to a cold lonely apartment, stuck in bed all night. Oh well, I made my own bed, time to lay in it.

1 comment:

Paul&Annie said...

Missed you at practice this weekend, but it sounds like you could use some time off. Glad to see you are buying a new bike, something to take your mind off training for maybe a couple days, but please take care of yourself and do something more: see all the movies you've been meaning to see, go wine tasting, even take a road trip or fly somewhere for the weekend. Don't forget that when you focus on something, you miss out on other important things.